why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Randomize
