He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
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