I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
my mom said i couldn't bring cigarettes cause it was a family trip, which was really irresponsible of her because now i have to walk around the beach drunk trying to find someone with cigarettes.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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