R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
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