I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
