Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I want to stick my p in your. b.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I know I said I wouldn't, but he told me I looked like Mila Kunis. Reasons not to fuck him, go.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
You told us that you were going to become a 'new man' and threw your tv set out of a window.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
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