Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
Are you sure he's still you're boyfriend when you're sober?
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
Randomize