My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
