I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I talk a lot when I drink rum. he was going down on me and i was telling him how i wished i could tap dance. oh god
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I'm not sure. But a mason jar of drug free urine just as soon as anyone can would be so awesome.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.