How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
It is too early in this hangover to be seeing some guys ass crack.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Randomize
