Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I'm not a creep or anything, just a lost soul looking for a good lay
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If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
you know that moment when all the alcohol kicks in and suddenly you realize the bar is very loud and you just want to bite someone sexy and ride their face i am kinda at that moment
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
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Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
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