my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
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