Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
Just rescued a super cute pair of Gucci heels off the sorority lawn on my way to work. Things are worth two paychecks. Fuck trust fund kids.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
