Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
Have you ever eaten pizza and gotten your dick sucked at the same time? Because I have pizza.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
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