Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
We talked him into tasing himself.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
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