It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
we should paint friendship bongs
Randomize
