Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
You ran into the tattoo shop screaming PIERCE MY TITIES
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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