I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
He just kept repeating "It was like meep meep meep on my balls."
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