Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I just found a thank you note I apparently wrote to my bed last night for letting me borrow the comforter.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Randomize
