but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Quick, to the slutcave!
those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Randomize