I looked at my own cervix.
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
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We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
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Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
No sorry. I may be a happy drunk but my gag reflux is an angry drunk.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize