it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
The dog threw up again, this time IN the toilet. I've taught him well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize