im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
She is dumping me if she doesn't get a ring by Valentines. So one more month of free sex and it will be back to the right hand.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
