fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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