smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
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