I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
By round 4 of the Dead End shots, I thought my jaw was dislocated ... Best invention EVER.
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
So I have to send you an email about my weekend, heretofore referred to as The Perfect Weekend. Wherein I have lots of awesome sex with a guy with THE MOST AMAZING BODY.
I look forward to this email. I will respond with, Condoms and Creepers: The Adventures of Online Dating.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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