Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i got your date sluuuuuuut pick up my calls or else hes mine
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
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Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
The word cocktail makes me want to rip my liver out and nail it to a cross.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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