Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
Somewhere between the 2 hours of sex and her urgently rushing to work she manged to steal all $329.33 in my jeans. Worst one night stand ever, she even took the pennies.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize
