you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
So many Oreos I'm regretting this decision already but I'm happy at the same time...The straddle is real
Struggle. Not straddle. I'm not straddling anyone.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
Pretty much just farted directly in a baby's mouth on the subway
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
