Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Going to a party tonight. Sorority girls will be there. Primary goal of the night: make one cry. Secondary goal: become a father.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
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