There's a guy at this party taking all the unfinised beers and pouring them into a pitcher so he can drink them tomorrow.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
