So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
He puked, did more shots, and then pissed in a drawer. We thought it was bad enough and all of a sudden...boom-clothes come off and he passes out with slippers and a styrofoam hat on and a guitar hero guitar in hand pretending he was slash.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
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