woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
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Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
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Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
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