He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
Randomize
