watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
