like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I wish you could order shots online.
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
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