guys are not supposed to queef...right?
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
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