I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
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