I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
I'm hiding in my office refusing to turn the light on holding puke down stealing and shoveling down the meeting snacks and regretting my poor life choices. goldfish crackers are like crack to me right now. how is your day?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
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