Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
