i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
Randomize
