i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
I don't think I will ever be as happy about anything as this man next to me on the bus eating Taco Bell.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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