So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
last night I used snow as a chaser
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
Randomize
