Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Definitely got drunk and sent her a literal picture of my asshole. I titled it " you"
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
