Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
One of the bamboo sticks broke and impaled him. I think he's drunk enough that it shouldn't hurt until tomorrow.
I flossed his teeth and then we had sex in the bathroom. It just seemed like a good idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Randomize