She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
Met Dan at the park for lunch and the guy parked next to us was getting a BJ the entire time. Way to make me feel like an inadequate girlfriend, random park skank. All Dan got was a double cheeseburger and a large iced tea...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize