): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
Randomize
