I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
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He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
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I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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