Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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