Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
I faked an abortion last night.
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
I love the moment a guy admits defeat against the front clasping bra.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
That's the girl I met who was peeing on the driveway with me. We bonded
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
