11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
now I know why they wanted me to come. apparently gay guys are stripper magnets
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Why does your life consist of lesbians, black guys and cats?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
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